Bad Mood

Man, did you ever just have one of those mornings? Everything that could possibly go wrong goes wrong, and then you sit down and take your first sip of coffee and you look down to realize that somehow you managed to put on your olive shirt with your dark olive pants and that you look like a bruised avocado (with really bad hair) and will continue to do so for the rest of the day?

Perhaps it is not a scenario you are accustomed to, but trust me, it suuuuuuucks.

Additionally, I just can't get over stupid things today. In general, I'm a very laid back sort of guy, in that I don't let most things bother me for very long. Bad stuff happens, you deal and move on. But today, damn if I can't get over a stupid grudge I thought I gave up a long time ago.

I know empirically that there's nothing to be done now and dwelling on it will do nothing but piss me off, yet my brain stays fixed on it. Mostly because of a conversation last night, wherein I realized something that I knew about myself, but it makes me feel bad nonetheless:

I am a shallow person.

Heh. Well, obviously, you say. We've covered this before. But now I'm specifically shallow.

More to the point, while I can almost always get over anything, the things I find hardest are situations in which I get burned over money. I get over fights and insults and relationship stuff, but God help you if you cost me $2,415.75. I'll do the whole forgive and move on thing, and then I think I'm over it, until something happens like last night and I'm all "If I had that big wad of money, this would not be a problem," and I'm right back in it.

I guess I'm just too analytical and budget-minded with money. There are plenty of what-ifs in relationships and whatnot, but things with number values are way too easy to calculate. Damn my math skills.

So yeah, neurotic much?

Resolved: Today I will get over myself. Or cut that guy who screwed me over. Whatever works.

Ooh, and later on I have an exciting cooking misadventure to recount. I'm all over the place today.