The OC is slowly killing my soul. Why, oh why, does everything I love turn to suck? Buffy, Angel, these late seasons of The Amazing Race. I swear to God, if Arrested Development ever begins to slide, I'm gonna find me a cabin in the woods and go all survivalist on everybody.
Do you understand, that now my three favorite characters on this show are Julie, Alex, and my former (and future, lets not kid ourselves) arch-nemesis Marissa?
Goddamn Marissa is suddenly the most compelling thing on this show? I feel like vomiting a little just from typing that. Sandy is dead to me, Seth and Summer have officially dragged on for 3 episodes too long, and I'm so over Lindsay that I really want to go back and AU the entire season so that she actually did get drunk and drown in that one episode, all Dawson's-Creek-Abby style.
I love Ryan's hair (even if it is a bit much) but for the love, he is boring boring boring. Is it possible to contrive any more situations in which he has to deliver bad news to someone he loves for dramatic impact? Can adults no longer speak for themselves? I mean, Jesus, it's only the second season, there's still time for some variety.
But in other ways, there is no time for variety. Do you have any idea how long it's been since someone got punched at a party on this show? Far too long. I don't watch this show for fake FBI storylines involving the reanimated corpse of Kim Delaney, I watch it for the glitz and glamour fisticuffs, along with the not-so-subtle homoerotic subtext that runs through the very fiber of the show, both of which have been sorely lacking this season.
It got so bad last night that during the first FBI scene, I switched over to Survivor to escape the pain. Of course, as soon as I did, there was a crazy old lady standing in a boat singing a creepy Pirate Survivor song that she had obviously made up in her spare time and it disturbed me so greatly that I ran back to Fox with open arms, but still.
I liked the new characters. I thought the introduction of a band venue was trashy, but they brought in good people, so I let it slide. But now we're just rehashing the same crap, the characters have lost all their likability and I'm actively considering other TV shows. It feels like we're breaking up. How did it come to this?
This next episode better deliver all the resolution the previews promised, lest I actually do turn to Survivor and its creepy singing old ladies. Even that is better than the dreck Fox is spitting out these days. I have to stop writing, this is just painful.
I mean, I still watch, and it's still dramatic, but it kind of sucks. Even if the lesbians are kind of impressively natural and not overwrought. And Julie continues to be the most awesome thing I see on TV each week. Why I can't I be more like her.
Sigh, whatever. Please just bring back my pretty, pretty, Season One. I'm not even coherent anymore.
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