Oh You're In for It Now

It's a Friday and I still don't have anything to talk about. You know what that means - Poorly Thought Out Review Day! And I haven't posted in a month, so there is no end to the things I can review.

Movies

Superman Returns - What the hell happened to this movie? You have a bunch of really good elements: A perfectly serviceable new Superman in Brandon Routh, a competent, if weirdly wooden Kate Bosworth, Kevin Spacey as a horrible, horrible Lex Luthor, the always awesome Parker Posey, and poor James Marsden in his eternal role as that cuckolded love interest.

(Aside: No, seriously, James Marsden should be studied: 3 X-men movies, The Notebook, Heights (okay, not technically on this one, but very close), and Superman Returns. In each of these movies he somehow loses his girl to another guy, despite basically being a good guy at heart. That is pretty much everything he has starred in, except that horrible gay movie with Scott Speedman that I sort of liked. Can you really make a career out of being the conventionally handsome foil who always loses the girl? I am very impressed for some reason.)

These are the component pieces of a movie that could be very awesome if put together properly. There is a huge camp factor all over the place - just the presence of Parker Posey alone is enough to set off the sense, and when you factor in just how bad Kevin Spacey is, you can practically feel it oozing out of the screen. But instead, it is just about the dullest romp through dullsville that you can imagine.

Even the action sequences are sort of dull. I understand that yeah, he's Superman, he's mostly invincible, but come on. He literally looks bored throughout the entire movie.

Also, I was really appalled at the lack of Clark Kent they had going on in this movie. I don't know why I enjoy the cover-up identity more than the secret one, but I do. And this movie contained many 10 minutes of Kent. I was not amused.

And okay, I get that Clark is supposed to be sort of a non-entity, which is how people never make the connection - omigosh no glasses, he's totally different! and all - but seriously. Lois Lane is now a Pulitzer Prize winning journalist. And yet the fact that the reappearance of Superman on the exact same day as Clark Kent sets off exactly zero bells for her? Or Jimmy, or anyone else on the Daily Planet staff? Combined with the fact that they both left at the exact same time? Jesus-Tapdancing-Christ, give me a break. I get suspension of belief to a degree, but the movie was so boring I had plenty of time to reflect on this matter and it just really bugged me.

So yeah, I was sort of disappointed. High hopes, dashed.

-----------------

Clerks II - On one hand, it was sort of lame. Lame plot, some bad acting, some stilted dialogue on occasion, and beastiality.

On the other hand, it was sort of really funny. And Rosario Dawson is ridiculously hot. And that little diatribe about Star Wars and Lord of the Rings cracked me up uncontrollably. I can't reasonably hate a movie that made me laugh out loud several times.

God help me, but it wasn't that bad. Kudos Kevin Smith, you apparently still have some weird sway over me. Well played, indeed.

------------------

Stranger Than Fiction - Very enjoyable, from beginning to end. Seriously. Usually I can't deal with Will Farrell, but apparently this is his month for not pissing me off. He and Maggie Gyllenhaal are great, Dustin Hoffman makes through an entire movie without driving me crazy, and Emma Thompson is amazing. The only character that doesn't work is Queen Latifah's, and its not necessarily her fault, there just doesn't seem like a purpose to her being there.

But the plot is gimmick-cute without being over self-satisfied (something that is usually only accomplished by Charlie Kaufman when you're talking gimmicks). It sets up the plot and then just goes on with the story. There are some genuinely cute moments (Flours? No, seriously, I was the only person in the theatre to laugh at that line. I felt bad at the time, but come on, that's hilarious), some touching moments, and a little bit of a lesson. It's not a crime for a funny movie to make you think a little.

Heartily recommended.

-------------------

The Prestige - First off, I think the movie has been out long enough that I can do a little bit of spoiling here without engaging too much wrath. It's a really good movie. Much better than I expected. 19th century magicians in blood feud? With Scarlett Johansson all up in there? The hopes were not high.

But they pulled it off remarkably well. Michael Caine continues to do no wrong, and everyone else pulls their own weight just fine. (Shout out to David Bowie, you just do your thing, sir. Hats off to you.)

The plot is all twisty, as you expect, but not overly so. There's nothing horribly cheap lying in wait, so long as you're okay with a little sci-fi thrown in to your magic for good measure. The only thing that didn't really work for me was the double-secret-twist at the end that was supposed to be the real shocker. It's set up pretty well: telegraph what looks like the big shock so that when the real one happens they're not expecting it. Only I had the "Ohhhh, I get it" moment back about 45 minutes before the reveal, so I was a little sad.

Still an excellent movie, though. And it had Piper Perabo. Never can have too much of her.

----------------------

I'll spare you the book reviews for now. But if I get bored later, watch out.