Monday, April 24, 2006

Today I am a Power Dialer

There is no shame on the internet. This is what I tell myself. It may be one of those self-evident things, since you can read about pretty much every single embarrassing event in the past two years of my life just by going through the archives there on the right-hand side.

I bring this up for the simple fact that I almost didn't write this entry due to my sheer mortification of what I'm about to say. It's that horrible.

So.

I voted for The American Idol.

Which, okay, may cause a slight gasp, maybe would require a fainting couch carefully placed for a delicate 17th century Victorian, but is not necessarily a deal breaker in terms of my complete sell-out into the low end of popular culture and the Coca-Cola juggernaut.

But let's go for full disclosure here: I voted for The American Idol 102 times. In a single hour.

No wait. Back up. I got through to American Idol 102 times in a single hour. You can't even begin to fathom how many times I actually called in to the AI.

You see that? That abbreviation? I have slang terms integrated into my mind about this show. The wheels have fallen off my cred vehicle.

I don't know how it came to this. I blame Frank, I blame Coke, I blame the ease of the redial button. I blame Television Without Pity for getting me overly involved with its scathing recaps, I blame Will Makar for not making it into the finals and thus implicating me in his demise since I did not vote for him. But most of all I blame the beautiful and alluring siren song of Katherine McPhee and her really hideous wardrobe department.

The only thing keeping me from flinging myself off of the nearest cliff in shame (except for the fact that the nearest cliff to Dallas is a pretty good ways off and would probably require an extended car ride and my radio is broken) is that I still maintain a modicum of decency: Any time someone uses the word "McPheever" around me, I go into a white hot rage that cannot be quelled. Even I, the saddest power-dialer in all the land, have my limits to fanatical fan-isms.

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And incidentally, I already miss the Ace Young and his wounded puppy dog eyes. Someone needs to put me out of my misery right now.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Your votes were likely wasted. If more than one vote line is full (some calls are rejected) then they are not measuring which singer gets more votes, they are measuring which singer's phone line can take calls the fastest. Computer speed, not voters, determined the winner.

Anonymous said...

Not only should you be embarassed, but I too am embarassed that you would do such a thing..... I just don't know if we can be friends anymore. It was one thing when it was The Frank getting all into it, what has happened? Clearly I need to move back and give you a better influence. On the other hand, I just bought The Sims 2 for xbox because I needed something other than sports to play...... its like we are getting older and don't know each other anymore