Cheating

Herein you get to see my craftiness. Since I have designated Friday as Day of Boring Reviews, by cleverly not posting for two days, I get to opt out of having to think of real things to write about until at least Monday. Y'all just watch out, my mad skilz are all on display today.

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Oh, asides: I had real reasons for not writing, as there were real life things going on for once, which is why I don't feel remotely guilty about not writing, despite my personal pledge to actually start writing consistently again. So there.

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Oh asides #2: Okay class, now can everyone say "Thank you, Mr. Cuban"?

"Thhhaaaank youuu, Mr. Cuuuubannnn!"

Remember a couple of weeks ago when Mark Cuban gave away free round trip tickets out of Love Field to everyone at the Mavs game? Well it pays to know people, apparently, as my boss's husband was at the game and he gave me his tickets in a fit of ridiculous generosity.

So now I have 3 days left to decide where and when I want to go (you can schedule your trip up to November, but they have to be booked by this coming Sunday). Never before have I loved Mark Cuban as much as today. Okay, maybe that day that he worked in the Dairy Queen, but certainly not since then.

Travel suggestions are welcome. (My four landing/return destinations are: Austin, San Antonio, Kansas City, and St. Louis.) I'm thinking St. Louis just for the sheer exotic factor, but we will see. (Other weird thing: I'm old enough to rent a car now, which makes this whole thing much more doable and optionable. I am very excited.)

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And now that we get down to it, I don't have a lot of reviews.

Breakfast on Pluto: Man, was 2005 just like the year for excellent movies? I completely dug this thing. Wickedly Dickensian (and not in a bad way, like Twist. Did I write about Twist? I should have. That movie was 12 kinds of fucked up. But Mmmm, Nick Stahl. *drool* ...Wait, what were we talking about?) by which I mean just so cute and full of crazy transvestites with hearts of gold. Or, y'know, orphans befriended by all sorts of colorful characters as they grow up and into their destiny. Take your pick.

Also, Cillian Murphy. That is all.

Proof: I tried to go back because I couldn't remember if I wrote about this back when I first saw it and I couldn't find anything. Which means nothing, since my search engine is shoddy at best, but it is unconscionable that I let this go by without comment. I love this movie so much. Gwenyth Paltrow turns out to not only be able to act, but puts in what I say is the best actress performance of last year. A complete travesty that she didn't get nominated for anything. Jake Gyllenhaal scales new levels on my hotness scale by broaching the subject of Cute Math Geeks, for which I apparently have a fetish. Anthony Hopkins feasts on every available piece of scenery he can get his hands on, which is all I ever ask of him. The movie is a little stagey, but the dialogue is just spot-on delicious. And I was actually kept in suspense about the plot, something that almost never happens nowadays, what with me being so cynical with a heart so black.

Silent Hill: Okay, fine, yes it sucked. Overly dramatic, crammed a storyline that really didn't fit together. Excessively gory, when creepiness would have served it just as well. Dialogue so bad it could stun a small bird. Sean Bean "acting" so hard that it made my head hurt.

All that aside: Surprisingly and intensely true to the video game on which it was based. At times, ridiculously scary to a shocking degree. Beautifully shot, perfect art direction. Pyramid Head. Those goddamn ash children and the twitching nurses. I'm sorry, but just I can't get my hate on entirely for the movie. Yes, it was not worth the money paid to get in, but since they only charged me a student price, I feel slightly vindicated.