Oh Hey, I Have a Blog. Perhaps I'd Like To Write in It

My writing skills are pretty rusty these days. You'd think that writing would be like bicycle riding or falling off a horse - something that you never forget how to do and is fun for the whole family. But instead it's more like calculus or shooting a high powered rifle - the skill rapidly deteriorates without constant practice and it's only fun for people with severe personality disorders.

But in any case, let's see if we can't bang out a few stories here to kill time between bouts of job hunting.

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So I've become one of those technology worshippers again. I had been doing ridiculously well for years - my last major purchase was a widescreen LCD monitor ages ago, and even that was on sale. I hadn't done a computer purchase, or any large scale electronics buy since changing apartments almost two years ago. I mean, yes, technically in the interim I bought a ridiculous new car that was financially crippling in a way that electronics only dream of being, but that's different. I need to be able to drive around places. Preferably in high luxury with an unreliable but prestigious brand name.

Wait, where was I? Who knows, but the urge finally overwhelmed me and I broke down and picked up a new TV to replace my 5 year old, 1,000 pound monstrosity that had been my constant CRT companion since 3 months before college graduation. In its stead, I have installed something even more outlandish - one of those widescreen plasma behemoths, in a diagonal screen size that I refuse to even mention, except to say that it's more viewing real estate than one should probably expect in an IMAX theatre.

You'd think that such a financially destructive move would leave me sobbing and gasping for air the second the credit card statement came in, complete with the wailing and gnashing of teeth, ending with an artful but well coordinated fall onto a fainting couch. But instead, several things have conspired to make this one of the best purchases I've ever made and quite possibly the only one that I've never once had a recriminating thought about.

1. I got a spectacular deal: I obsessively tracked online and newspaper deals for months, never pulling the trigger but constantly on high alert. You can ask anyone who was around me for the months of December to March - I would not shut up about pricing points and the benefits of plasma vs. LCD. It was like living around a Best Buy Associate gone mad. And to top it off, every 20 minutes I would do a scan of the deal sites for those quick fire-sale internet site deals . I never seemed to find any good TV ones, but I did manage to make several completely insane purchases at super low costs. A small sample of which includes: 10 pairs of designer sunglasses for $8.99, two cute shorty-short Penguin swimsuits (retail value $123) for $19.98 total, and two free decks of collectible trading cards (because I'm 12).
   
   Then finally I stumbled upon a super deal for a TV 4 inches larger than my target size, for less than $100 above my allowable budget. I snapped that thing up so fast that the keyboard practically smoked. I was pretty impressed with myself at the time (usually a purchase that large would require hours of agonizing and rationalization) for making the decision so quickly, but now I just worry that my impulse control is going downhill.
   
   
2. No sales tax on the internet, and they shipped, delivered, and helped me get thing into my living room FOR FREE. Which were the parts I was most worried about to be sure. Because my new car has only one disadvantage to the Truck of Malfunction, and that would be that it can't carry large-scale electronics. Plus I am a 150lb weakling in the worst way, and there are several stairs involved in reaching my apartment. Like, more than 8 of them. So seriously, free delivery and installation was just like Christmas, except the fat man involved was wearing a weight belt and driving a moving van, instead of a red suit and a sleigh. I did end up giving him a cookie, though.
   
   
3. I was able to sell the old giant TV to offset some of the cost: Roommate Frank got his network going and he managed to arrange the liquidation of my old monolith, which I firmly had expected to be a sunk cost. So really, it was like I got 20% off the sales price right there. Roommate Frank is awesome. (Also it was good to see my old TV friend go to a nice home. With room for him to run around and other TVs to play with, I assume.)
   
   
4. HD TV is the best thing in the world: No really. I can't really explain it, but everything is better in HD. I am less offended by bad sitcoms when viewed in widescreen and sharp definition. I am less incensed at terrible Mavs games when I can see the sweat on Dirk's face so clearly. Watching How It's Made on the new TV comes so close to fulfilling my dream of working in an assembly factory that I can basically pretend I'm right there in the warehouse.
   

And I'll stop there, but you get the drift. Not for a single second have I regretted my wild bout of spending, a feeling which is both joyous and terrifying at once: This is totally how shopping addictions get started, isn't it? First the deal hunting, then the buying of useless but cheap things (what do I need 10 pairs of sunglasses for?), then the large purchase that brings nothing but joy. It's a slippery euphoric slope.

We'll see how it goes, but I think I have it under control.

In unrelated news, has anyone got a line on a good Blu-ray player?